1914 Yearbook
Source URL
Title
1914 Yearbook
Description
WEDNESDAY.
Scene: Master of Discipline's Office.
Time: October 6, 12:48 P. M.
Master of Discipline (seated at his
office desk): Let's review last
Wednesday's account, and compare it with the present time. Ah,
I find another record has been
broken; twenty on the blacklist
and fourteen on condition, that
makes a merry array for this afternoon! Come in! (Enter H. S.)
H. S.: Well, Father, what's the
chance? I want to go to the city
and see a show. This particular
show has a character in it exactly
like the part that I have to present
on St. Ambrose Eve. It's a cracking good show, well worth the
money, and certainly will be an
eye opener to me for my part. I
must see this play; so I'll be going, Father! Au revoir!
Master of D.: Your resourcefulness,
I fear, has spoiled the case. Back
to your room, and ere the sun sets
on another day you'll be in Wool-
worth. Au revoir! (Enter W. S.)
W. S.: Father, I have a date that 1
must keep, and so I pray you to
allow me to proceed townward!
What's the dope?
Master of D.: You were only an
hour late last permit, Bill; so, today you can go till half past two;
but mind, if you have not reported
here by then, you'll find your cup
has overflown, and you will certainly have another date in Latin
Hall!
W. S.: But, Father, my date today
is with a doctor friend from home,
and you know full well I could not
break away at two!
Master of D.: I'm sorry, sir, but this
is no debate! Retire, and don't
block the way. (Quick curtain.)
J. HYNES.
OUR IDEA OF
The height of anxiety—Murphy two
minutes before the dinner bell rings.
The height of ambition—O'Malley
in an interclass athletic event.
The height of uselessness—Frazer
at two minutes to seven.
The height of lonesomeness—W.
Schmidt without Charity.
The height of wisdom—Anyone
that can keep his name from the
blacklist.
The height of cleanliness—Klise expectorating horseshoe into a bucket.
The height of propriety—Walking
down Harrison street without flirting
with D. H. S. girls.
The height of beauty—Any D. H.
S. girl—a mile away.
The height of good will—Fr. Hau-
ber wearing a shamrock on St. Patrick's day.
The height of disappointment—The
second day here.
The height of harmony—Hischoot
practicing on the violin.
The height of absurdity—"Whit's"
green hat.
The height of nerve—Going to the
American on Wednesday afternoon—
when "Tinker" is there.
WISDOM ROW EBULLITIONS!
Mr. Kerrigan called into Ye Ed's
yesterday. He says he is going out
West when he grows up. Seems like
Leo has grown up quite handsomely
already.
Mr. Shields showed us a new patent face tonic, which he says is just
the thing. "Jew" looks so well himself, we should think so. But we
feel that in his case we should advise
enamel.
We would all be satisfied with our
lot if it were 25x125 and worth
$12.50 per square foot.
Scene: Master of Discipline's Office.
Time: October 6, 12:48 P. M.
Master of Discipline (seated at his
office desk): Let's review last
Wednesday's account, and compare it with the present time. Ah,
I find another record has been
broken; twenty on the blacklist
and fourteen on condition, that
makes a merry array for this afternoon! Come in! (Enter H. S.)
H. S.: Well, Father, what's the
chance? I want to go to the city
and see a show. This particular
show has a character in it exactly
like the part that I have to present
on St. Ambrose Eve. It's a cracking good show, well worth the
money, and certainly will be an
eye opener to me for my part. I
must see this play; so I'll be going, Father! Au revoir!
Master of D.: Your resourcefulness,
I fear, has spoiled the case. Back
to your room, and ere the sun sets
on another day you'll be in Wool-
worth. Au revoir! (Enter W. S.)
W. S.: Father, I have a date that 1
must keep, and so I pray you to
allow me to proceed townward!
What's the dope?
Master of D.: You were only an
hour late last permit, Bill; so, today you can go till half past two;
but mind, if you have not reported
here by then, you'll find your cup
has overflown, and you will certainly have another date in Latin
Hall!
W. S.: But, Father, my date today
is with a doctor friend from home,
and you know full well I could not
break away at two!
Master of D.: I'm sorry, sir, but this
is no debate! Retire, and don't
block the way. (Quick curtain.)
J. HYNES.
OUR IDEA OF
The height of anxiety—Murphy two
minutes before the dinner bell rings.
The height of ambition—O'Malley
in an interclass athletic event.
The height of uselessness—Frazer
at two minutes to seven.
The height of lonesomeness—W.
Schmidt without Charity.
The height of wisdom—Anyone
that can keep his name from the
blacklist.
The height of cleanliness—Klise expectorating horseshoe into a bucket.
The height of propriety—Walking
down Harrison street without flirting
with D. H. S. girls.
The height of beauty—Any D. H.
S. girl—a mile away.
The height of good will—Fr. Hau-
ber wearing a shamrock on St. Patrick's day.
The height of disappointment—The
second day here.
The height of harmony—Hischoot
practicing on the violin.
The height of absurdity—"Whit's"
green hat.
The height of nerve—Going to the
American on Wednesday afternoon—
when "Tinker" is there.
WISDOM ROW EBULLITIONS!
Mr. Kerrigan called into Ye Ed's
yesterday. He says he is going out
West when he grows up. Seems like
Leo has grown up quite handsomely
already.
Mr. Shields showed us a new patent face tonic, which he says is just
the thing. "Jew" looks so well himself, we should think so. But we
feel that in his case we should advise
enamel.
We would all be satisfied with our
lot if it were 25x125 and worth
$12.50 per square foot.
Date
1914
Identifier
http://cdm16810.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/p16810coll2/id/3346