1915 Yearbook
Source URL
Title
1915 Yearbook
Description
SLAMS
Murphy: "What profession do you propose to take up, Mr. Light?"
Light: "My highest ambition is to become a lawyer; to stand before a large
assembly of men and prove to them and to
the jury that the prisoner could not have
committed the crime with which he is
charged. If that does not convince the
jury, I shall show that he was insane when
he committed. If that fails, I shall prove
an alibi."
Thomann: "What is the matter with
Mell Morrin? Every time I go into his
room he is generally holding onto the back
of a chair and shuffling his feet."
Van Waus: "There was a time when
I'd have said he was tipsy; but now, perhaps, he's practicing a new dance."
Prof.: "Give me a double adjective,
George."
G. H.: "A two-legged chicken."
Welch: "Please, father, may I get off
this afternoon about half past two?"
M. D.: "What is the matter with you
this time, James?"
J. W.: "Well, to be honest, father,
there is a good bill on at the Columbia,
which I would like to see."
Kleffman: "They are going to quit hauling corpses on the Rock Island."
Dave Murphy: "Why so?"
Kleffman: "They won't get them there
in time for judgment."
Kane: "I'd give you a tip, only I've
nothing but a ten-dollar bill."
* Pullman porter: "Oh, that'll be enough,
sir.
Prof.: "Now, Chauncey, if a man can
do one-fourth of a piece of work in two
days, how long will he take to finish it?"
Chauncey: "Is it a contract job, or is
he working by the day?"
Murphy: "What profession do you propose to take up, Mr. Light?"
Light: "My highest ambition is to become a lawyer; to stand before a large
assembly of men and prove to them and to
the jury that the prisoner could not have
committed the crime with which he is
charged. If that does not convince the
jury, I shall show that he was insane when
he committed. If that fails, I shall prove
an alibi."
Thomann: "What is the matter with
Mell Morrin? Every time I go into his
room he is generally holding onto the back
of a chair and shuffling his feet."
Van Waus: "There was a time when
I'd have said he was tipsy; but now, perhaps, he's practicing a new dance."
Prof.: "Give me a double adjective,
George."
G. H.: "A two-legged chicken."
Welch: "Please, father, may I get off
this afternoon about half past two?"
M. D.: "What is the matter with you
this time, James?"
J. W.: "Well, to be honest, father,
there is a good bill on at the Columbia,
which I would like to see."
Kleffman: "They are going to quit hauling corpses on the Rock Island."
Dave Murphy: "Why so?"
Kleffman: "They won't get them there
in time for judgment."
Kane: "I'd give you a tip, only I've
nothing but a ten-dollar bill."
* Pullman porter: "Oh, that'll be enough,
sir.
Prof.: "Now, Chauncey, if a man can
do one-fourth of a piece of work in two
days, how long will he take to finish it?"
Chauncey: "Is it a contract job, or is
he working by the day?"
Date
1915
Rights
St. Ambrose University, 518 W. Locust St., Davenport, IA 52803
Identifier
http://cdm16810.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/p16810coll2/id/3700