Maloney answered the door bell and the visitor asked : : "Do you happen to be one
of the professors?"
Barnes' pet expression : KIN-E-GO-TO-A-SHOW?
"T. Lew," said a "boob", "will be a great doctor some day."
"Why?" said another…
V. Costello went into L. Boyle's room and saw Leonard using a Latin pony and
exclaimed, "Aw, heck! Can't you translate that Latin without an answer book?"
Hink O'Niel : "Father, I'd like to have another room."
Fr. Hannon : "No, no, all…
ALL AGES, COUNTRIES, AND RACES
THE WORLD'S FIRST AND FOREMOST
Who Has Witnessed
Each and Every
CAIN'S ALL-STARS vs. ABEL'S TORNADOES
THE THORNS vs. R. I. INDEPENDENTS
Van Albert, Holland.
Mutt, New York.
Honey Boy Evans, Indiana.
Jimmy Wilde, England,
Napoleon I, France.
We went to DeWitt a hundred strong.
To make it interesting we took plenty of jack along ;
We offered the lucre all down the line,
Then we argued and pleaded, but didn't get a dime.
The game started slow with not a score for either…
Rippling Rhymes by H. B.
He sat in the shade of the palm of his hand and
slowly dotted his eyes ; then he cut from his trunk with
his shoulder blades, a limb, with a great many sighs.
He took from the limb a full grown calf, and fed it on
Things We Want to Do, Try to Do, But Can't Get By With
Get some real jokes for this department. Get a general average of 99.99 ;
Be in to class on time ; Eat all the spuds ;
Talk in class-room and study-hall ; Sleep over mornings ;
Get by in class…
Shirk : "These doughnuts are just like Mother makes at home."
Bush : "Yes, sir, they are in one detail."
Shirk : "And what's that?"
Bush : "The hole is the same."
Dan Hannon : "Say, you know I'm getting mighty careless about financial matters."
Fr. O'Rielly : "Voltz, who led the people into the Promised Land?"
Voltz : "Which Promised Land do you mean, Father?"
And they always told me "they" were only to be found on the farm.
A young student by the name of Barry at a college baseball game…